A date

My dearest, sweetest, most anally under-experienced lover of the unrequited variety...

I long for you, and yet I feel I cannot tell you how i truly feel...I have seen you, strawberry-blonde hair amidst a sea of indifferent black and brown...I have seen you, your eyes full of kinkyness and credulity...I have seen you, with other men....AND IT HURTS!!!!!!!

I know that deep down you long for a healthy, strong and meaningful grope....thus far I feel i can only resort to ruhipnol aperitifs for and kind of aquiesence, but my love for you is too sincere to allow me....

Meet me, under the railway bridge in southend town centre, thursday night......come alone.....

until then, adieu

Anonymous (but you know me really)

You've got me wrong...well, I suppose not really. I will be there, we can kick the homeless guys and their dogs to one side and show them how it's done!
See you tonight,
Much love